I think my pride and ego took a hit when my finish times started to increase. One of the reasons why I run is because I like how it feels when I'm running fast. When all of my motions are in sync, my arms are swinging beautifully in time with my legs, and I feel like a running machine, I am happy. I didn't want to lose that magic during my races. Inevitably, I couldn't keep up with the volume of mileage and the pace at which I wanted to run. My finish times went from a 4:30 average to a 5:00 average. Throughout my runs, I would beat myself up for walking or running slower than I wanted to. I would push myself hard for a half mile, and then pay for it on the second half by walking. I would end up with an average pace that was a combination of near-sprinting and walking. It made no sense. I noticed that even though I could enjoy a good, fast pace, I would still end up hurting because of the pressure and impact it was putting on my body. I would end up with an overall slower time because of all of the intervals I was putting myself through.
When I ran my first double (back to back marathons), I was paced for the first half of the race by Halbert. He helped me to really keep my pace on target so that I could conserve energy. I distinctly remember by mile 17 that I felt like I hadn't started running yet. I felt fresh, warmed up, and as if I could run all day. At that point, I decided to finish up the race at a much faster pace. I didn't feel burned out or injured. I ended up with a negative split and an appreciation for how pacing can save my legs.
That double was in the first month of the year, well before I became tired and started to experience burnout. As the races stacked up, I turned off the pacing parameter notifications on my watch, and continued to run/walk. As the year and my races wound down, I began to get nervous about my 100k. The Hoover Dam marathon was my last race before the 100k, and felt like I was dying. My body was tired, and again, I was trying to run faster than I should. I had three weeks to recover and decide upon a plan for my 100k. I was extremely nervous and anxious due to the performance at my last race.
After voicing my concerns to Halbert and my friends, I decided that I should just run an easy pace, and focus on finishing. I looked up some predictions for a finish time based on my past performances. From there, I figured that an 11-12:00 min/mi pace would be best. Halbert was a lifesaver in helping me to establish a good pace for the first lap. I always tend to speed up if I'm feeling good. He knows this, and helped to rein me in. I was able to maintain an average pace of 12:22 throughout the race. As I mentioned in my race report, I felt very energetic and strong during the race. I was utterly shocked at how fresh I felt, even after the finish.
My performance made me a little mad at myself for running in such a foolish fashion in the past. I equated running fast to being strong and having fun. Now, I see that running at an even, controlled pace leaves me feeling much more energized and happy. I feel like now I just need to actually train, and focus on improving my stride among other things, in order to really crush my first 100 miler.
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